Sunday, December 30, 2007

The Moment

Even a year ago I used to visualize the very moment when I would see my name on the "SELECTED CANDIDATES" list of a company during the placements. How would I react? Will it how Sushmita Sen reacted on her name being announced as Miss Universe 1994, or will it be like the way we react when India wins a cricket match in the last over. How will it be? Would I be dumbstruck and statued with my mouth wide open, or laugh and shout of excitement. Will I go mad of happiness. Perhaps I would clap, 'cause that's what I do when India wins. I would hug my mother tightly with broad grin on our faces. Call every person I could think of and burst out my achievement to them. The long fought battle would at last been won. So much of preparation and prayers have at last born result. I would have got a job. It would take a few months to get back to my normal being from the world of flattery and congratulations.
Perhaps that's what was supposed to have happened. That's what was expected from me who craved for a job for years more than anything. Not a single prayer was made without having the plead for the best job. The wish was granted.
But it wasn't at all this way. I was standing in the corridor in front of the Training and Placements Section with the notice board glass reflecting nothing else than my own image. My eyes got stuck on the single piece of paper ignoring many others which hung by its side. This "special" paper had my name on it. I've got the job. I saw it much carefully this time to convince myself. My heart bounced while my palms sweated. I was suddenly feeling warm in this chilly December morning. I rang up home to tell them what I had just seen.
This was the only moment I waited for years and now I stood there all alone with my own voice echoing in the empty corridor as I walked back home. Neither Sushmita Sen nor cricket type reaction, only a few waves of agility up and down the skeleton. Life remained the same.
But I hope the moments of celebration are yet to come. My colourless mind awaits to be painted.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

A Tribute

Batchmates know me as one who neither helps nor take help while in exams. And trust me, I'm very proud of that, even if I score pathetically , for I never like to share my success with others. If I win, it's my victory and if I fail, it's my failure. I can proudly claim that every mark and grade that I've scored is entirely mine.
Smells arrogance in air..isn't it???........Well, let me tell you from where it all started.
We were in fifth standard in school. The changeover time between two consecutive classes was fully utilized in playing "kith-kith" (the common game played by primary girls) ,the venue being the backyard of the principal's room.As small arguments evolved into noisy quarrels ,a short chubby lady used to appear from no where with her greyish brown eyes on us. A heavy scolding ...and we would fly straight to our classroom. That was how we knew her and was pretty afraid of her. Seniors said , she was the best teacher in school, but I found her very scary.
Yes....by now , my school friends may have recognized the person I'm talking about.
Mina Ghose Madam
She was my English teacher in standard sixth and seventh at school. The fear and apprehensions about her vanished the very first day she came to take our class. As the days passed on and I came to know her better, I could understand why seniors considered her to be the best teacher in school. She was the best teacher I've ever seen and perhaps the best teacher on earth.She was dedication and benevolence personified . In an inhomogeneous class like ours, comprising of students from convents and from Hindi medium, it was her perseverant motivation that brought every student to the same level. I still remember her Grammar Classes. She pointed out, "A common mistake which a number of people make is using a simple sentence as interrogative sentence by changing the tone in which they say. "You will come???" is what a number of convent going kids ask in a interrogative tone. This is a big mistake. It should be "will you come???"". She insisted us to learn five new English words each day from the "Oxford Mini Dictionary" , which she asked every one to carry. Had we been sincere then, chewing the vocabulary for GRE and others wouldn't have been a nightmare.
She was and will always be a motherly figure to me.Her care for students had no vitiation of favouritism...From front-bencher Ravi, to back-bencher Jagdishwar...all received her tender attention alike.
Once she told us an anecdote which had a profound influence on my life.S
he had an examination and during post-exam discussions with her friends, it was found that,all but her had the same answer which was totally different from hers . It was expected that hers would be the wrong answer, for so many couldn't have arrived at the wrong answer. But to their amaze, ma'am had the correct answer. She said "Never adopt unfair means in exam. It is possible that you know the correct answer while your friend doesn't. Have faith on yourself and the courage to face the results."
These words got permanently imprinted in my mind entangled with my conscience. My inner voice never allows me to ask or show answers to my friends during exams. The values given by Mina Ghose Ma'am stops me from telling a lie no matter how harsh the situation be. Yes...I consider myself a very honest person. "Your daughter is honest", she told my father during a Parent-Teacher meeting. The compliment I'll cherish my whole life.

Today, I would like to tell you all, that I owe my success to my Mina Ghose Ma'am. The triumph of getting my first JOB is dedicated to her. The BEST TEACHER and the most inspiring person in my life....MINA GHOSE MA'AM.


Dear Mina Ghose Ma'am ,
Thank you for your love and tenderness. It would have been the best moment to see you smile and congratulate me for my achievement. Your teachings will always enlighten my path. May you be in good health with that charming smile on your chubby cheeks. Kindly bless me for my future.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Story of a "Book" Worm

There was a worm. Her husky brown color camouflaged with its wooden niche'. Day in and day out she kept herself busy scratching her head with one of her dozen legs wondering what to do when she grows big. Shall she go exploring other corners of the world or live a comfortable life where she had spent the earlier years. Fellow worms turned into elegant colorful butterflies and spread out their wings to conquer the nature. But this poor worm had no hope of having those colorful wings for it had an ugly brown slithering body. She thought that perhaps her life would be unlike others, a dull and gloomy among the thick bound books on the wooden shelves. Her slithering body and tiny dozen legs rebelled with the thought of becoming a beautiful butterfly and set free from this corner of the library into the garden swaying over the nectar filled flowers. Her monotonous days passed by chewing the pages and the covers of the books. While her friends were already unfurling their wings , this worm was still crawling deep behind the books.
One fine morning the worm woke up hopeless. Her mind was not bothered by any apprehension. Life seemed the same but had something unusual. Fellow worms gazed at her with astonishment. Some wished good luck while others were dumbstruck. She felt uneasy and something uncomfortable around her chest under her shoulder. As she rotated her head to find the cause of this vexation, her eyes spotted a sliver of bright crimson wings circumscribed by golden yellow. Her heart bounced within her chest. The day has come . It's her day. She has finally got wings. She was about to shed her slithery brown skin and transform into a velvety black bodied butterfly. She stretched her wings, which flattered among the dusty books. The world outside waited with all its extravagant display to welcome her. She was standing on the edge of the book shelve which had been her home for so many years, her wings flapping gallantly. The runway was waiting for her and she was ready to take off.

Friday, December 7, 2007

Death of Aditi Das

Alarm clock beside her head rang just on time. It was 5 in the cold December morning. She woke up with a peculiar enthusiasm very much unlikely at that point of time, as if she was waiting for something. Clutching her sweater which lay asleep beside her pillow she stepped down her bed to look for her slippers. Sliding her feet in the purple slippers she headed towards the room where the computer rested. As she walked through the rooms to get there, bulbs and tube lights illuminated to see what this girl was up to. With one stroke of her finger the machine came to life. She swirled the mouse to search for something. The monitor saw her dreamy anxious eyes drop back to dismay. The computer thought if only it could ask for help, it would have rendered it to her. May be her search was over as she left the computer again to have a nap for an hour. It was 6:30 then, when she again dug into the internet to have another investigation. Her anxiety and restlessness was now visible to other member of her family as by now they too have come out of their beds. A couple of phone calls were made. Dressed in a perfect attire she rushed for some urgent cause.
An hour she engaged her mind in what is called the written test. An announcement regarding the shortlist was made during the test. Her sanguine and confident heart waited. As she headed towards the notice-board she knew not what waited for her. The piece of paper was all set to rip of her heart and assault her pride and identity as a departmental rank holder.
Her confidence, pride and arrogance was crushed. There was attack from both the fronts. From the mind and from the heart. She stood there still in the hope of getting some life savior from other papers hung on the notice-board. This time her tear glands rebelled and she could not fight back. She was strangled and bitten brutally by her strong feeling of being a failure.Slowly she drowned into the chasm of despair, dejection and pain. Perhaps this is the fate of the girl who thought she was bright, hard working and honest in what ever she did. Perhaps she wasn't fit for the time. She will lay in this gloom until rays of hope and morality makes it's way through this chasm to reach her. That's how Aditi Das, the "Clayden book muggu" died.

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Erased...

Yesterday I wanted to go to the moon next street. I had set my steps towards it and was may be few yards away. I wanted to take a gleams of that mysteriously glowing red disk. But they grabbed me from all around and forced back into a room they called "my room".I was so close to my destination. Just a right turn from where I could reach would have let me stand face to face with the moon. Things in this room looked familiar. I've seen them earlier but couldn't recollect where. I hesitated to touch them for the one who possesses these may be vexed. But why did they force me to this room? "He's again left his room".."He's again going among the busy street".."What do we do with this man.We are fed up".."Why don't he die??" they shouted on me irritably as they locked the door behind me in this room. Poor fellow, they must have mistaken, this isn't my room. I tried to have a look at the moon from the window which led in a busy market place below it. Well, while the resident of this room doesn't arrive I think I can use is armchair to relax. How about trying his black framed spectacle from over his table and have look at the newspaper?His glass fitted well on me and I could see better. Browsing through the printed lines of the newspaper I felt asleep I knew not when. My sleep was terminated by the sound of unlocking the door. Perhaps the occupant of this room has arrived. Where had he been so long?May I apologize for using his room and his spectacle?But it wasn't my fault, those strangers forced me in here.
The door gave way to the woman followed by a man."Last evening he again set free and walked straight through the busy road. Had Ramu not seen him go towards the fruit market , perhaps we would have lost him this time. His attacks are more frequent these days. This is his fifth attack in this week. " said the woman in a concerned note. "I told you so. As the years will pass by the frequency of the attack will go on increasing till it reaches its extremity when he'll remember nothing.That is the last stage of Alzheimer's" said the man nodding his head and throwing a glance at me. "So what do we do now?"asked the woman."There's no remedy to this disease yet as I've told you earlier. I can just say don't leave him alone and try to spent much more time with him. Here's some sleeping pills which can be given in case he turns violent and unmanageable" said the man as he scribbled on his writing pad and handed the woman a piece of paper torn from it. But whom are they talking about? and why are they staring at "me"?.
"This isn't my room. Sorry for residing here last night.I used your spectacle" I said in an apologetic tone as I landed the spectacle where it laid earlier. They both exchanged a hopeless look and stared at me in a convincing way. "This is your room"said the lady softly. "I'm Shobha, Can you recognize me?". She was almost in tears. "This is Dr. Desai, do you remember"...This time a drop trickled down her wrinkled cheek. As she wiped it away with the back side of her right palm she hasted towards the cupboard and opened it."These are your shirts, this is your study table.And ,and this is your spectacle. The black framed one which you chose from the Mittal Opticals last year.Don't you remember you spent hours in this room with your calculations and studies."She dashed through the room trying to find some thing or the other to show me which she could claim of being mine. "I-I'll show you the group photo. Here, look at this. This is you on this armchair with your grandson Pinku. The same room with the same table behind you in this photo."She was pointing at the photograph of me with a boy of age may be three or four. Yes she was right. It was the same room as I'm standing now. The room I've spent my night awaiting its resident. So, the resident is "me". But I couldn't remember a thing. Neither this room nor these people.
I walked slowly towards the window. The street under the window led to the red moon next street. Perhaps I could go there some day................................................

Monday, September 24, 2007

I'm not your friend...

I'm not your friend if you think
I would fall asleep listening your dreams.

I'm not your friend if you need to
thank me for whatever I do for you.

I'm not your friend if you need to
feel sorry for not being able to help me this time.

I'm not your friend if you need to
laud me for mere achievements of mine.

I'm not your friend if you need to
give me excuses for what you did.

I'm not your friend if my presence
makes you feel uncomfortable.

I'm not your friend if you feel
like plugging your ears when I speak.

I'm not your friend if you don't
see my efforts to make you happy.

I'm not your friend if you don't
realize when I'm sad looking into my eyes.

I'm not your friend if you need
to think before sharing your sorrow with me.

I'm not your friend if you need to
remember me every time while making a list of invitees.

I'm not your friend if you hesitate
to reveal your secrets to me.

I'm not your friend if you need
to search for words to make me smile.

I'm not your friend if I need to
explain the reason of my happiness and grief.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Retrospection (contd)

Well starting from where I ended may not be much interesting because nothing exciting happened soon after. The faces which had become familiar and friendly in the past one year had gone and a set of new faces joined me this time only 14 excluding me. Only 15 was left to occupy class rooms which could accommodate nearly 40. So we had enough space all around to take lung full of breath and sit relaxed. The classes were then being populated in a peculiar but very much scientific manner. A very few sat in the front rows and a majority at the back, as if there was an energy gap between the energy level. The more enthusiastic ones in order to make a better impression on the teachers and to engulf the lectures more clearly settled down in the front seats while the relaxed ones occupied the seats sticking to the wall opposite to the black board. I was in the first group along with the other and only three girls in the class.The very well dressed and sober Saba , the very punctual and discerning Debarati , and the very sincere and perspicacious Mohona . Lab classes gave us enough time to do all our chatting and gossiping on topics possibles on earth from TV serials to the teachers to fellow classmates.
It was the dinner of Dept Intro in our second year. We were now among the seniors though just a year ago we were the freshers. There's nothing like ragging ever that I've seen apart from a few verbal questioning to the nervous looking freshers. I've experienced it before. Few of my seniors and friends started interrogating the freshers and felt pity on them. I wanted to restrain Mohona from this and landed up in squabble. That was the first and I hope the last time I've had any wrangle with her.
Didn't talk to others much initially which perhaps made an arrogant image of mine. But those who know me often get bugged by my constant verbal effusion. A number of times me grouped with Mohona and Shiladitya engage in a friendly altercation with Abhishek , the boy from Patna on the very hot topic of Bongs vs Bihari ,who is joined by Pranavjeet. The noisy discord defies any restriction of place or teacher. May it be the Physical lab or in front of the Dept Office or near the Seminar room while an eminent guest was delivering a lecture, our decibel elevated higher and higher.
We tried hard to manipulate our time table at our will in order to get holidays in the week days and we succeeded to do so. Could often convince teachers to take classes apart from the early hours in the morning.
Had a Dept picnic in our third year. Though it wasn't much enjoyable but it was memorable. The place hadn't any water body like river or lake which I'm fond of, but had spectacular rose garden and greenery all around. That was first Dept picnic we attended along with the teachers and fellow depies.
Biochemistry classes in the Takshila building were a new experience with the video recording done. SDG ma'am seemed a bit conscious about her lectures and made each of her points very clear which she always does.
Three hours of lab classes soon gave way to double its duration. Spending six hour in a lab had vivid experiences. More time in lab meant more time of experimenting and working with the chemicals standing all the way through. But the thought of more time for gossip and relaxing allayed the exhaustion of standing for six hours.
But soon the classes and Lab were no longer for us 15 but was overtaken by a huge herd of "lattus". "Lattu" is what we call the 2 year Lateral M.Sc students. The most intolerable category of people they are. Exasperating and exploiting us to the fullest. Though initially seemed friendly but soon showed their parasitic nature when we got paired up with them in the Physical chemistry 2 Lab. With cheap jokes and mockery they tainted the ambiance of our serene and peaceful class of 15. Now the class had 41 heads. No more energy gap existed but a continuum of energy levels. Every chair had an occupant. And we the first benchers now joined our fellow Integrated M.Sc classmates in the back benches. I wish these people had never joined us.
Computational lab was too small to accommodate our huge population of 15. Paired up in groups of two, one of each group slumped on to the computers busy writing codes for the simulation. There weren't any space for the two partners two sit side by side. So the other one had to peep over the shoulder of his/her partner to have look of the screen for one set had to sit behind the other.
Dept intros used to be fun watching the freshers do caricatures as told by the seniors and even the teachers. A good dinner after that complemented it. Once a boy walked up to me and started giving me his introduction. I was a bit taken back for I never asked for his intro. He told me some seniors had sent him to me to give his intro as a part of his OP with them as I was standing aloof and had may be a stern look which made them think me to be very grave person. I enjoyed it having known that the boy was from Durgapur near my grandparents house.
The educational trip to Haldia last semester was more of a picnic than education. It would have been better had there been no "Lattus". Though we by god's grace managed to be away from them the entire journey but few of our fellow classmates survived their cacophonous orchestra all the way through.
I would like to end this post with a heartiest thanks to all my friends who helped and encouraged me all these years. I can never forget these people. It would be unjust not to mention these very special names. They are Mohona, Saba , Debarati , Shiladitya , Abhishek , Pranavjeet , Shubhadeep and JDB. Thank you all for the support and help that you've rendered me at different point of my college life.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Every morning...

A sudden terrifying noise fills in your room. You sit erect on your bed with mouth still wide open and hairs oriented in all possible directions as if to sense the source of this uproar. Your eye lids refuse to let you see the surrounding. But suddenly every thing changes in a flash and you are out of your bed still grumbling on the alarm clock to spoil your hard earned sleep after the last night ordeal with the report. The Laptop still lay on beside your pillow. As you jump over the bed to rush to the toilet and squeeze in some paste on the toothbrush and plug it into your mouth ,you storm in your wardrobe to find a suitable outfit for today's presentation. Buttoning your shirt you head towards the laptop lying on your bed tilted by your sprang out of your bed few minutes earlier. A hoarse sound trumpeted from below your window. A black Toyota Qualis stood at your gate all set to rush you to your destination. Now you hardly have any time to gather your files and papers scattered in your room. You snatch your watch and mobile from the table and stuff it into your pocket. As you hop towards the front door in an effort to struggle your foot into your socks with your briefcase presses under your arms pit , you take a moments glance in the mirror to bid yourself a goodbye for at least 16 hours.
Before you could open the day's newspaper to get a gleams of the business page, you've been driven into the front door of the building which has become a major part of your life now. The glass door admitted you into your "world" ..."The corporate world" and you are the senior manager of sales of this company. You are standing in the company's head-quarter ready to attend a business deal.
This has become a daily routine every morning since you've been promoted.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Retrospection

The wrist watch pointed 8:25 in the morning. A number of students , all casually dressed, stood gossiping outside the door. A number in white over the dark brown door wrote F-236. Cacophonous babbling penetrated the wall to fill the corridor. The door revealed a dimly lit room filled with strangers. It was full to its maximum or perhaps more. I wasn't late but a awkward thought of not getting a place to sit occupied my mind. Soon a cleanly dressed man with papers and files in his hand entered the room and I followed him. That was how I stepped into my first ever lecture class in IIT KGP. The first lecture for Section 6 of 2003 entrants was Mathematics I by Prof. M.P Biswal. Later that day we had Electrical laboratory which imposed on us a number of rules and regulations. I was grouped with two students of the EC dept, namely Piya Pal and Argya Bhowmick. These two never stopped hassling on the experiments. That was my first day in IIT.
Fellow students made it difficult to catch hold of books in CL by misplacing and hiding the books. This made me a regular visitor to the CL to get the books from the Reserve Section. Foundry classes were really backbreaking. Though my partner Pavan did a lot more work than me , the ambiance was so arduous that it made me tired by mere standing. Life was moving in a fast pace. Bright faces of few of my school friends in the common lectures elated me.
Wednesday evening NSO classes provided me with a sound sleep in the afternoon after lunch. The only sleepy afternoon apart from the weekends.
Basic Electronics Lab were frustrating every Monday afternoon because of the instructor who was so querulous that we named him "FOX". Not a single day passed when he didn't find a single mistake in our lab notebook. My lab partners Meenakshi and Madhuri used to complete the Lab note book just an hour before the Lab class which made me rush to the hall having half my lunch every Monday. So did they.
Alternate weeks of experiment and tutorial class of Electrical engineering were frightful. Though huge electrical appliances and voltages and current made me nervous working with them but the constant chirruping of Piya and Argya made me enjoy the three hours.
Lab partner in Physics , Jayant kept himself miles away from experimenting. "Arre experiment kya karna, reading taap lo" is what he said every time with a notebook of readings from some or the other classmate for every experiment.
The lab class which I enjoyed the most was Engineering drawing. Scored some good marks in the paper work as well as CAD.
A harsh comment from Prof Anjali Roy before the mid-sem exam made me weep. That's the way I express my grief and contempt. This made me much focussed to score a good grade in English in the first year. I landed up with an A.
I am thankful to Rohit, Mtech dual degree of Aerospace, for helping me understand a topic in maths. "sigma-epsilon method" is what it was called as far as I remember. But alas !!! I made a silly mistake getting a zero which I could have scored full marks otherwise.....
I still remember, I found a boy of my class very annoying and irritating. He came up to every one with stories of the various insects found floating in various items of his Mess food. He is Joydeep Banerjee popularly known as JDB.
My appearance was austere. A typical "behen ji type" or may be fogyish. With loosely fitted salwar suits and oiled hair sticking to my scalp made me look something else apart from an IITian.
My image of being a bookworm followed me from school. Soon next year a new adjective came flying to me from all around. "Phodu" one who excels in some field, and for me it was academics since I never participated in any extra curricular activities. Staying at home I had little scope to join the midnight sessions of practice and rehearsals.

Strength of the class reduced drastically from 88 in the first year to 15 in the second year. Classes were now mostly in our Dept. New faces now occupied the seats in the classroom. My friend Mohona knew a couple of them. Day in and day out the same faces appeared in the class room. Lab classes gave us plenty of time to do our chatting and gossiping. I knew not when these strangers became my friends. And then.....

I'll stop my writing here for I need to keep something stored for my next post.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Aurora




This photo is of course not taken by me ,but couldn't stop myself from sharing it with my blog viewers....
This is AURORA. This is the most spectacular view of the night sky.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Fooled by innocence

It was a Saturday morning. The sky was overcast by gray clouds but wasn't raining. There was a knock at the door. As I peeped across the wooden door , a sliver of a girl stood there all set with a helpless look on her face. The door revealed two shabby and dirty looking girls. Their clothes reflected poverty. Disheveled and rough brown hair indicates that they are deprived of combs for a long time. Tattered and dirty over sized frocks were tipping off their shoulders with the frills hanging unstitched at a number of places. Cracked lips and unclean face with despair in their eyes was enough to draw anyones pity. "Didi, our father died a few days ago. Please help us" said the girl who was taller among them. There faces reflected innocence and helplessness with dirty hands already outstretched for the monetary help.I was experiencing the vicarious sorrow of these two poor girls standing at my door step. I closed the door after slipping in some money into their hand.

A few minutes later when stood in the balcony to have the cool and moist air, I saw these two girls singing and whistling merrily as they went by. I couldn't believe my eyes. A few moments earlier they were bereaved by their father's death and now they were enjoying. A sense of frustration and bemusement filled in me. I was fooled by them. I can never condone these two girls for lying about there father.

A couple of months later these girls were once again at my door with the same filthy appearance and helplessness in their eyes. I was determined to be rude with them this time. As I opened the door, one of them spoke up in a similar morose voice . "Didi, my father has got cancer. Help us" . I was taken aback by the confidence of this girl to tell a lie so convincingly. This time I let them down. Moments later I saw them throwing back coins at our neighbour who happened to be fooled this time and bothered to give them coins. They took currency notes not coins I came to know. Disrespecting money when they need it so badly made me more hostile towards them.

I can never forgive anyone lying about his/her parents or any other near and dear ones just to earn his/her livelihood. There are many other ways to earn money. One can work hard to earn and that is what many people do. I believe that there is one or the other work that one can do according to age and capability. If people become honest and hardworking , there's nothing that can stop a country to prosper. But using unfair shortcuts to earn money is what makes a country sluggish in the quest of prosperity.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Manzil

I've never been know for my poetic excellence neither have I tried one before.

Jab manzil hai shikhar
toh kyun thakkar baith gaye
ek kadam aur badhaiye
dekhiye, manzil ke aur kareeb aa gaye.

Kitni hi badhayein aayi thi rahon mein
kintne hi thokar lage the paon mein
par honsla nahi tha dagmagaya
toh fir aaj thakan kyun hai aap ko manzil se behkaya

Jab manzil hai shikhar
toh kyun thakkar baith gaye
ek kadam aur badhaiye
dekhiye, manzil ke aur kareeb aa gaye.

jeet ab nishchit hai aapki
aap kadam toh badhaiye
manzil hai itne kareeb
thakan ko jeetne na dijiye

Jab manzil hai shikhar
toh kyun thakkar baith gaye
ek kadam aur badhaiye
dekhiye, manzil ke aur kareeb aa gaye.

sakshi hai aapke parisram ki
yeh sanse aur yeh kaya
math dijiye inhe parajay ka gam
jinhone ab tak hai saath nibhaya

Jab manzil hai shikhar
toh kyun thakkar baith gaye
ek kadam aur badhaiye
dekhiye, manzil ke aur kareeb aa gaye.

sanchit kijiye woh aakhri takat
jo ab bhi shesh hai
haarne na dijiye khud ko
iss jeet ke aap hi yogya hai

Jab manzil hai shikhar
toh kyun thakkar baith gaye
ek kadam aur badhaiye
dekhiye, manzil ke aur kareeb aa gaye.

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Parents --- Mine or Yours

"When a wife takes care of her in-laws isn't it the responsibility of the husband to take care of his"....

A friend of mine asked my opinion to this question. This was posed to him by his girlfriend who happens to be a single child. They had a conversation the day before on this question which turned out to be so acrimonious that they kept aloof for a couple of days.
The point emphasized by his girlfriend was "when I'll have to take care of your parents after our marriage then isn't it your duty and responsibility to care for my parents. I being the only child, have the responsibility towards them. You should also take care of them as I do it for your parents".

Indian society which bolsters the notion of equality among men and women, seems to abate when it comes to the implementation of this very thought. It has been the long tradition in the Indian society that the girl after marriage is bound by some invisible chain of responsibilities towards her in-laws. Leaving behind her parents , she steps into this new world filled with new faces. In this patriarchal society , it has become obvious that girls will look after her in-laws with very little responsibility towards her own parents. The girls' parents find it shameful to ask for help from their son-in-laws.
Parents who have only girl child find it difficult during their old ages. Pension and savings can't give the mental assurance which is needed at this time of life. Often at this age they want someone by their side to support them and take care of them. The apprehension of being abandoned and helpless at the time of emergency engulfs them.

So isn't it the responsibility of the girls to take of their parents at this stage of life??. Shouldn't the husband and wife look after and take care of both the families??. When the girls do it for her in-laws why shouldn't the boy do it in return??. I greatly support my friend's girlfriend in this matter. It's not a matter of forcing the husband to do these. Our society should inculcate this thought into the young minds. Both sides should be treated equally.The older people need care and support may it be of the husbands' side or the wifes' side.

I strongly support the thought that , in cases where the parents have only girl child , the girl should be allowed to keep her parents in her home and take the best care possible for her parents with the support and encouragement of her husband.

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

My Happiness.....

It's the fish curry that made me happy today...Or may be its the victory of the protagonist of my favourite TV soap on that wicked villain...No, perhaps it's because I could slip into my sister's dress which indicates appreciable loss of my weight...I don't know what it is but I can feel my heart buoyant. It seems as if my heart is defying the Newton's law of gravity. It has broken free from the clutches of tensions and apprehensions and now it's jumping, flying, swirling , laughing and dancing. And that's why I'm happy.
One would think...."Is the author sane? I mean.. what's there to be happy about? Some boring TV serial or a silly fish curry...How disgusting it sounds"....But I am not bothered...There's no definite reason for me to be happy. I can be and I am happy about things which most find silly and childish and at times very boring. I don't blame them.
My reasons of happiness are very austere. I can draw happiness from instances which others find dull and morbid. A new earing which attracts the attention of my friends makes me happy. The sprinkles of rain into our balcony over our flowery shrubs make me happy. Watching pigeons fly in and out of the small gap in the tall water tank make me happy. The success of an ant to swim out of water after much effort makes me happy. A clear sky after a shower makes me happy. The fragrance of the morning flowers make me happy.Watching the sprinklers spray water on the institute lawn makes me happy. The rainbow over the grey canvas makes me happy. The sliver of the sun from behind the clouds makes me happy.The pink sky of dusk with patches of orange clouds bordered by gold of the setting sun make me happy.And there are my pets which always make me happy.
We all have seen these at a number of times but have you ever been happy at their presence ?. Did your heart leap if not dance? Could you sense a sudden pleasant change in ambiance? Did you stand still to appreciate them?Did you fall agape?I do...Every time I see them.
This world is full of wonders and every moment we live is a wonder. It is we who can draw happiness out of it. In todays hectic life we complain about tension and workload. Happiness is around us. It is us, the individual who needs to find it out. If we learn the artifice to draw happiness we will find ourself on top of this world with our heart sharing the same sensation as of mine today and at this moment.

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

my love

It all started in my first year here in IIT. A mere acquaintance led to a strong eternal bond. A bond which can bend but never break. It wasn't pleasant,the time that we spent together but some unknown power has kept us so close so long and I think this special relationship will be by my side till the end. I fail to understand the hostility of my friends towards it. They are so acrimonious that they don't let it any where in there vicinity. And yes, they consider themselves to be happy. They consider it to be some sort of pathogen that when attacks a victim leaves him/her with sleepless nights and strange facial expression. "LOAD mat le yaar" , "Arre LOAD kyun leta hai" are the common consolations heard from well wishers but the victim shows no sign of recovery until the "LOAD" wishes to spare him all by itself.
"Now u r in final year. Peace maar. Ab toh 'LOAD' lena bandh kar" is what friend say but how can I make them understand that it's not me who owns it. It's a joint effort. Now it's impossible for me to part off. I can't break this relationship, just because I want to be "so called" happy. I can't be so rude to walk off now when it had supported me all these years in IIT. I owe my success and achievements to "LOAD". Hadn't it been there to accompany me I won't have come this far. It's because of "LOAD" that I've stuck to my goals and worked accordingly to achieve them. I heartily thank "LOAD" for all my achievements.Yes, I love you "LOAD". You r an important part of my life.
How can I forget those exam days when you used to be awake with me till late night as I prepared for the next day...You used to accompany me to the lab when I would not be prepared well for my viva. You have helped me when it came to the submission of assignments on the last date. You were still there when I banged my head to find that simple error in my C code that would make my code run properly in the last few seconds of the PDS lab test. I can feel your presence everyday. However disguised you may be but I can feel you with closed eyes. You fill the air with warmth and trepidation. It's always a great sensation when you are around.
So, will it be just to leave my "beloved LOAD" when it had propelled me so far. At this verge of transition from college life to the harsh world of reality can I let go my partner, my supporter , my driving force just because I want to be happy. No, I can't do that....I want "LOAD" to be by my side always with happiness along with it.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Driven me CRAZY....

Story books or novels had never been my adoration. Partly because I can't defy my elders who have the notion that there are much more relevant things to spend time on rather than light up your eyes on a story book which is fictitious and partly because I enjoy activating my eyes and ears in front of a screen, may it be of the television or the computer.
Inspite of all these ,I've managed to engulf a few including one or two of the Nancy Drew and Feluda series. They were good but failed to kindle the diligence to read further. I was placid about this inability of mine till I came across the creation of J.K Rowling. My friends used to eulogize this book like many others that they read. But may be it was a jinx or a hex cast by this lady,Rowling, that made me to flip through the first book "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone". It was as if the book was enchanted by some spell I knew not what, drove me crazy for it. The alacrity have now taken the shape of craziness for the books as well as the movies.
As I imbibe into the words of the coarse and yellowish pages of the bound books by the Bloomsbury publication I find myself amongst the various witches and wizards in the environment created by the author. Sometimes I find myself attending the class of Professor Snape with his black eyes narrowing on me while the other time I'm flying on a broom after a golden snitch playing Quidditch. A number of times I stand amongst the Unforgivable curses of Lord Voldemort aimed at Harry while the other time I'm enjoying delicious end of the term feast with Ron ,Hermione and other Hogwarts members.
People find it childish or even waste of time , reading these fantasy stories without a trace of reality garnished to it. But as I've said , the author has surely cast some spell on it which keeps me bewitched and leads me to gluttonously engulfing the book untill its through.
The rumours that Harry Potter, the protagonist of this series will die fighting the dreadfull villain Lord Voldemort seems fading now that I've read the penultimate book to the series "Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince". Though the author has very ingeniously tried to create an atmosphere of anxiety and concern for Harry amongst the Potter fans , but I opine that it'll not be end of Harry in the seventh book.
The seventh book is destined for 21st July 2007. Now it's a matter of hours for the revelation of the mystery..........

Saturday, July 14, 2007

A walk to remember

The cool morning breeze streamed over my face along with some of my hairs. Some dry leaves which lay silent , suddenly seemed to gain life as they danced with the breeze to land at a distance from where they were earlier, accompanied by some strange colored dried flowers. The old trees ahead cast deep, dark , cool shadow. Though the sky was bright and blue but the sunlight had to force its entry through the thick canopy. The rustling of the leaves whispered me to take another step into this enchanting world. My step into this paradise was greeted by twittering of the birds. As I outflanked my hair from my face and took another step forward I spotted a scarlet flower beaming at me. It nodded in the cool breeze as did the green leaves which hung loosely from the trees on either side of the road. I bent forward to have a closer look at it. Just as I inched my hand to have it , a bright colored butterfly whirled over . I drew back and ambled my way through once again...
The swirly road underneath looked like a gigantic serpentine with yellow spots of the sunlight over the dusty brown body. Dew drops dazzled like diamond over the edges of the grass in the streaks of sunlight.
The trees on either side of the road were my companion along the way.The vivid color of the flowers attracted humming bees and colorful butterflies. A divine aroma of these unknown flowers intoxicated the whole atmosphere. It bewitched me more into its deepest core. Green moss covered stones looked like throne awaiting in regalia for its king. Bunches of voluptuous fruits swung with the air of arrogance as the sight of the onlookers got stuck on them.
As I stepped further into this enchanted world, chuckling of water in concord with the twittering of the birds and rustling of the leaves was carried to me by the breeze. A moment later trees came to a halt and there stood before me a stream. Its clear water sparkled in the bright sun light like a stream of jewels.
I stood their with my arms outstretched to embrace the golden sun which was now glaring at me. Incense of unknown flowers and wet soil was still imbibing my senses.
I wished this moment to be eternal...


Friday, July 6, 2007

The Rainy Concert...

Have you ever wondered , what is the lyrics of the frogs' cacophony....I'm proud to announce, I have...It rained and rained and rained ,submerging the tallest tip of the grass,and it continued to rain even after....this was the perfect podium for the frogs to begin their orchestra....If you are lucky and have enough understanding to appreciate their choir you are cordially invited...Like the school band which had never practiced,they started in an asynchronous note, but soon gained perfection....well, since I haven't much of understanding of their divine music I could engulf only a meagre amount....The concert started by appraising the Almighty for the rain and rejoicing every moment of it.."Re'ny Dey, Re'ny Dey" they all sang in their typical nasal voice.....This was followed by a song detailing perhaps their next concert venue.."Maine Gate, Maine Gate..." it continued ,with more songs to entertain the audience which had various insects and worms among the special guest apart from me....The concert continued with the song from their latest album,"Cake Cake Cake Cake...",,,I was so deeply enchanted by the musical extravaganza that I hardly realized that my nose was sticking to the rain poured window pane as my face rested on the fisted support of my hands and eyes fixed on the watery lawn spread before me.....It was raining, now more heavily than the what it was in the beginning....I turned back, leaving behind the concert in its full fiesta.......

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Ohh....What happened to my Department???

Nothing could be seen clearly....thick mist was clinging the thin air as far as eyes go....acrid smell of chemicals and burnt laboratory equipments filled the surrounding making it difficult to breath...the building stand there all alone among the wreckage,,,dilapidated and crushed....the broken and upturned piece of the shining label promptes the glorious existence of the building before the devastation....fumes erupted here and there and often caused small fireworks as chemicals got mixed...I was standing there..all alone..my heart sank the more I thought about those precious time we spent there, with friends and teachers.....I was standing before our Department..our beloved department,now in ruins....."Get up...it's already late"...Did I hear a faint voice???...No, may be I was hallucinating....Ohhh I can't imagine ...only yesterday it was as full of life and now it stand before me all in pieces...."Get up...it's time for lunch"..this time the voice sounded more firm and clear..and the next moment I was being rocked....It took me some time to regain my senses,....."You were sleeping for an hour , get up now, it's time for lunch",my mother grinned...Ohh it was a dream...a dreadful one....I was asleep pillowing a Quantum Chemistry book....I promised myself to never sleep with the dreadful Quantum Chemistry book to avoid such devastating dreams.....

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

GOD IS GREAT......is it really so????

People get annoyed of my habbit of punctuating conversations with .. "haan ??" ......watching the tv in a loud volume confirms the horrendous condition of my dear ears.............But then how come I can hear a kitten cry far away which others can't......is it my imagination then??? Is it a shear sound ringing in my mind.......no..it can't be...i'm sure of it........not once or twice ....I did hear it a number of times...crying for help....crying for its mother....Baleful behavior and decorum of people added more to my concern...I saw a man stoning the poor creature.....How can someone be so inhuman, ruthless??? This continued the whole day, putting a full stop to my work and annihilating my concentration....my eyes went searching for it every now and then....I wished if only I could help it....cries abated after dusk....may be it got back to its home in the warm cuddle of its mother.....
But God wasn't that kind....to aggravate the anguish of the kitten, it's mother died leaving behind helpless to the mercy of the nature,five of its siblings....Benevolent me couldn't keep out any longer....Since then it's become a daily routine to go and feed the kittens every evening ,for they are too young to feed themselves.....
All these have brought me to the verge of being an atheist....."God helps those who help themselve"...."Those who have no one , have God by their side".....all these adages seem vague to me now....I don't know why are these poor creatues being punished.....But to believe that "GOD IS GREAT" is hardly possible for me henceforth.....